Picture-Taking Tips

Picture-Taking Tips for All Kinds of Christmas Situations

DECEMBER 14, 2014 by MARC SCHENKER

As December rolls around, we all know what’s just around the corner: Christmas. Yeah, that means breaking out the Christmas lights, singing some carols and hitting the eggnog, but, if you’re a photographer, it also means an almost limitless number of shooting opportunities that only come around once a year.

If you think that Christmas is a boring time of year for photographs, then have we got a surprise for you today!

This is a time of year that presents unexpected places, setups and ideas for you and your camera. So put on that Santa Claus hat and start singing some Bing Crosby tunes because here are some killer tips for capturing the essence of the holidays.

Merry Christmas
image by JD Hancock

Set up Your Own Photo Booth

For something highly creative and unexpected during a Christmas party or gathering, set up your own photo booth right in your own home. Save the money you would’ve spent on an “actual” photo booth, and enjoy the fun of operating your own. All you need is a spot in your living room or perhaps even near the entryway of your home. Think of it as a self-portrait zone, if you will.

Set up your camera on a tripod, right in front of a solid-colored background, like an orange curtain. Encourage people to shoot themselves by setting up the camera with a short self-timer.

Play up to the Christmas season by leaving things like Santa hats and tinsel around your photo booth, so that your guests can adorn themselves with these decorations while shooting themselves. You’ll be surprised at the booth’s popularity all throughout any party.

Photograph the Preparation Stages

Sure, the big payoff is always the actual Christmas party or big dinner, but you may want to capture what the preparation was like, too. Lots of picture-taking opportunities will present themselves during the course of the day, leading up to the big gathering or celebration. Some of these moments will include basics such as wrapping presents,preparing the food, decorating the home, setting the table, small children getting rowdy while getting dressed up, etc.

These preparation shots offer a somewhat candid look at people and the environment before the big get-together. This makes them really interesting for when you’re looking back on that particular event and wanting to get a better sense of what really happened.

Try a Time-Lapse Series of Shots

For a totally different look at how your Christmas celebration unfolds, try some time-lapse photography. All you really require is something as straightforward as a web cam on your desktop or laptop in some far corner of the room, as it’s trained directly on your dining table.

Program the web cam to go off at set intervals throughout the day. Say, having it go off every 5 to 10 minutes would suffice. At the end of the day, after everyone’s gone home, review this time-lapse series and relive the whole special celebration and gathering from a distinct point of view that you’ll not soon forget.

Find That Awesome Focal Point

Make a commitment to that one, Christmas focal point in each shot—and stick to it. The problem with a lot of photos is that, often, there are just too many focal points in the same shot that compete with each other. This type of counterproductive picture-taking is just ridiculous and creates some chaotic shots.

Instead, isolate just one focal point per photo during the holidays. It can be a spectacular plate of food, someone’s great outfit or, in a most traditional and predictable sense, the Christmas tree. Whatever you choose… make sure that it’s limited to just one per photo!

Take a Much Better Group Photo

The group photo is sort of the unofficial tradition of the Christmas season, and it usually takes place near the end of a party, gathering or dinner. In short, it usually takes place when everyone looks rather worn down and tired already! There’s a simple way to correct this unfortunate situation and make everyone in a Christmas group photo still seem fresh: Take the group shot when everyone has just arrived for the festivities.

That way, everyone from your Uncle Joe to your co-workers (and everyone in between) will still look very presentable in the group shot. And isn’t that what the true meaning of Christmas comes down to?

Use Continuous Mode for Opening Presents

Opening presents is the moment when everyone becomes a kid again and can’t wait to experience both the thrill and excitement of seeing what it is that they got. Sure, taking pictures of people opening—and then showing off—their brand-spanking new presents is a common Christmas tradition. However, using continuous mode for this occasion is not… though it well should be.

Continuous mode—sometimes referred to as burst mode—lends itself exceptionally well to the excitement and unpredictable facial expressions of this moment. While you’re shooting the reactions of those getting presents, we want to remind you that it can also be just as rewarding to shoot the reactions of the people giving presents in this moment.

Switch to Macro Mode

This tip is sort of the ace up our sleeve. Macro mode is finding itself into more and more cameras. If yours has it, switch to that mode and then let loose by shooting all of the tinier things around your Christmas environment.

Everything’s fair game: ornaments, gingerbread cookies, mistletoe hanging in a doorway, the nativity scene on your mantle, and table decorations. Just remember that it might also take some practice time to really get good at macro photography.

O Come All Ye Faithful…

Though Christmas photography may seem somewhat limiting to some, it really isn’t, as the above tips illustrated. It all really depends on how you think of this occasion and season. With the right creativity and effort, you can turn the Christmas season into a season of giving… you really awesome shots, that is!

If you want to take a little extra time to set things up, coach guests at your photo booth or for the group shot, and play around with various modes, you’ll soon see that the holiday season is full of photographic moments beyond what you already expected.

From the whole team at Contrastly, we wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! 🙂

Marc Schenker

About the author: Marc Schenker

Marc’s a copywriter who tackles the finer points of photography, but he also specializes in business and marketing topics like B2Bs and conversions. To find out what really makes him tick, head on over to his website, and don’t forget to make his day by liking his Facebook page!

Vaarwel slimfoon

The Secret World of Stolen Smartphones, Where Business Is Booming

  • BY MATTHEW SHAER
  • 6:30 AM  |

BEN WISEMAN

In late May of 2012, a damaged package split open at a FedEx facility in Rancho Cordova, California, spilling dozens of boxed iPhones across the shipping room floor. A worker there contacted Apple, which, with the help of corporate security at Verizon, confirmed what FedEx personnel already suspected: The devices were contraband, likely bound for the black market.

Two hours later, a man named Brian Fichtner showed up at the facility. Fichtner is thin and wiry, with the clipped demeanor of a career cop and a passing resemblance to the actor George Clooney. He has spent his entire professional life in law enforcement, first as a narcotics investigator and most recently as a member of the California Department of Justice’s elite eCrime Unit, a group tasked with prosecuting tech-related violations—identity theft, revenge porn, the large-scale smuggling of electronics.

Fichtner used a pocketknife to slice open the broken package. There were 37 iPhones inside. He wrote down each of the serial numbers and resealed the box. Then he sat back to wait. The next day, a Sacramento resident, Wasif Shamshad, picked up the package and, with eCrime investigators on his tail, drove west to a stucco apartment complex on the outskirts of the city. There the package was handed off again, this time to Shou Lin Wen, a gaunt guy in his late thirties, and his wife, Yuting Tan.

Investigators were assigned to stake out Wen and Tan’s two-story residence in the leafy neighborhood of Rosemont and were on hand when, on a sweltering day that August, the couple hauled four heavy parcels into a shipping facility.Further gumshoe work revealed that Wen had grown up in mainland China, immigrated stateside as an adult, become a naturalized citizen, and opened a cell phone and electronics shop in downtown Sacramento. His record was clean. Still, Fichtner had long ago learned to trust his instincts, and his instincts here told him that he was likely onto something big.

The destination of their shipment was an apartment in Hong Kong. The eCrime investigators watched Wen and Tan pay for the delivery, and once the couple had climbed back into their black Nissan Murano and driven away, the lawmen, along with agents from Immigration and Customs Enforcement, inspected the contents of the parcels: 190 brand-new smartphones, still in their boxes—mostly iPhones, but some BlackBerry handsets thrown in too. Many of the iPhone serial numbers matched the ones in the package picked up by Shamshad.

Fichtner’s suspicions were confirmed. Now he just had to piece together the particulars of the operation. Over the next few months, members of the eCrime group visited North Carolina, where the smartphones had been purchased, and a modest townhouse in Boston—the residence of electronics broker Pengchong Shou. Investigators obtained search warrants, downloaded bank records, and tossed trash cans. They whiled away hours on the phone with reps from Sprint, AT&T, and Verizon Wireless.

Contraband smartphones confiscated by the California Department of Justice’s eCrime Unit. COURTESY OF THE CALIFORNIA DEPARTMENT OF JUSTICE

A picture slowly emerged of a so-called credit-mule scheme, ingenious in its simplicity and impressive in its reach. Middlemen such as Shamshad were dispatched to seemingly random American cities, where they trolled homeless shelters and halfway houses, offering $100 to anyone who would buy, on their behalf, a few on-contract phones from a local electronics store.

Back in California, the contraband was handed off to Wen and Tan, who arranged to have the phones shipped to their contacts in Asia. The profit margin was enormous: In North America, wireless carriers typically subsidize the cost of our smartphones in order to lure us into multiyear voice and data contracts. To obtain a phone, in other words, we fork over a small fraction of the device’s actual market worth. Wen and Tan took advantage of the system by obtaining iPhones—through middlemen and mules—for $200 a pop, then selling them in China for close to $1,000.

Records obtained by the eCrime Unit indicate that in a single year, Wen mailed 111 parcels using his FedEx account. By the time the whole operation was brought down in March of 2013, he and his wife had become very wealthy, to the tune of close to $2.5 million in annual income.

Today, Wen is serving just under three years at a California state prison for conspiracy to acquire and resell stolen property; Tan received a lesser sentence of a year. (Shamshad, the middleman, was charged and convicted of receiving stolen property.)

And yet Fichtner and his colleagues are under no illusions that in apprehending Wen and Tan they have come close to eradicating the larger problem. “As long as there are profits to be made, thieves will keep on stealing phones,” Robert Morgester, the assistant attorney general in charge of the eCrime Unit, told me recently. He smiled. “I mean, why did Willie Sutton rob banks? Easy: because that’s where the money was.”

In 2009, roughly 5 percent of the global population owned a smartphone. Before 2015 is out, that number is expected to hit 35 percent, or 2.5 billion people—approximately the populations of China and India combined. Considering the ever-quickening pace of technological innovation and the shrinking cost of processors and chipsets, it does not take a particularly fertile imagination to picture the day when, perhaps as soon as 2017, half the world will be hooked up to the small screen of a smartphone.

For many of us, these devices are among our most valuable possessions. Or, at the very least, they are among the most valuable possessions that we cart with us everywhere we go. We hold them up to our ears on city streets, we fiddle with them on subway platforms, we set them on restaurant tables—little handheld computers with all the firepower of a laptop and almost none of the heft. Machines that hold our entire lives in their RAM, from family photos to work emails to the balances of our bank accounts. Machines that can be swiped, wiped, and resold for hundreds of bucks in the space of an hour, often without the help of a pawnshop or a professional fence. Machines that are worth 13 times more, per ounce, than a block of silver.

That’s why street theft of mobile devices—or “Apple picking,” as it’s known—has been such a widespread crime in recent years. According to Consumer Reports, 3.1 million Americans were the victims of smartphone theft in 2013, up from 1.6 million in 2012. The mobile security firm Lookout believes that one in 10 smartphone users in the US have had their phones stolen; 68 percent of those victims never saw their device again. Nationally, about one-third of robberies now involve a smartphone.

In 2013, Apple rolled out a feature called Activation Lock, which allows a user to password-protect a phone from being booted up again. With iOS 7, users had to mess around with their settings to make Activation Lock work; with iOS 8, it’s turned on by default. Google and Microsoft have pledged to package all new phones with similar software.For years, the mobile industry resisted making even the most minimal efforts to prevent street theft. It had little impetus to do so: The carriers make a lot of money selling expensive theft insurance to consumers, and if security software did successfully deter theft on a large scale, those same carriers might be out a lot of cash. (William Duckworth, a professor at Creighton University’s business school, has estimated Americans spend $4.8 billion annually on premium phone insurance and $580 million a year on replacement devices.) But the problem has grown so undeniable that even the carriers are powerless to resist reforms. Last August, after an intense lobbying campaign led by San Francisco district attorney George Gascón and New York attorney general Eric Schneiderman, governor Jerry Brown signed a California kill switch law mandating the inclusion of technology that allows users to lock up a stolen handset and render it unusable; similar legislation was signed in Minnesota.

Max Szabo, a spokesperson for the San Francisco district attorney’s office, says the arrival of Apple’s Activation Lock has already had a decisive effect. In San Francisco, iPhone robberies dropped 38 percent in the first five months of 2014; in New York City, Apple-related robberies were down 19 percent. “Clearly,” Szabo says, “as a deterrent, the kill switch really works.”

To which one might add a couple of qualifiers: The kill switch really works in certain circumstances and as a deterrent to one common type of robbery. If you’re a garden-variety street thief, driven by opportunism, then it’s true you might now think twice about pulling an Activation Lock-equipped iPhone out of a nearby purse.

But Activation Lock is only software, and as any programmer can tell you, anything coded can eventually be breached. In late May of 2014, for example, a pair of anonymous hackers went public with an iCloud bypass they called doulCi, which allows you to reset a device as if it were brand-new. Similar work-arounds remain online for anyone with the tech savvy to implement them.

And although Apple and Gascón probably wouldn’t want me telling you this, a locked phone doesn’t necessarily mean a worthless one. Dustin Jones, the founder of Harvest Cellular, a telecom recycling company, recently conducted a survey of 200 used iPhones for sale on eBay. Of those 200 devices, 32 were explicitly labeled as being stuck on the Activation Lock screen. Despite the best efforts of Apple, Jones concluded in a post on the Harvest Cellular blog, “thieves still have an easy marketplace where they can liquidate stolen devices.”

Just as worrisome is the fact that Activation Lock—and software like it—is effective only once a device has been linked to an iOS account and activated by a user who suspects their phone has been stolen. For that reason, a kill switch would not have stopped the fraudsters Wen and Tan—in that instance, there was no one to trigger the feature, and the phones were quickly shipped overseas, where they were likely (and promptly) fitted with new SIM cards. Nicholas Pacilio, a former spokesperson for the California DOJ, says that the size and frequency of credit-muling and fraud operations like the one run by Wen and Tan seem to be increasing.

As do the number of smash-and-grabs, in which thieves break into warehouses or electronics stores to obtain a treasure trove of unactivated devices. In the summer of 2014, the Florida attorney general announced the arrest of a ring of criminals who used stolen cars to crash through the doors of Best Buy, hhgregg, and CompUSA stores across Alabama, Florida, Georgia, and Tennessee. Before it was brought down, the ring had allegedly obtained roughly $2 million in Apple devices. Security analysts have started to see street gangs in Oakland, California, turn away from drugs and toward iPhones.

Indeed, Ben Levitan, a telecommunications veteran who has worked for Verizon and Sprint, among other major industry players, has argued that a kill switch, far from fully alleviating the problem, has the potential to send it corkscrewing in new and unpredictable directions.

A KILL SWITCH WON’T DETER THIEVES WHO QUICKLY SHIP PHONES OVERSEAS, WHERE THEY’RE FITTED WITH NEW SIM CARDS.

“So you roll out the kill switch,” Levitan says. “Great. Street theft might shrink a little. Maybe a lot. But the guts of the phone are still valuable, right? People are just going to be trashing their phones and selling them for parts.” He predicted the creation of a “whole new black market.”

There is evidence that market already exists. In Alameda County, the eCrime Unit recently busted an illicit smartphone-parts operation run out of a store called AppleNBerry. (The owners of AppleNBerry, Sammy and Steven Chan, have since pleaded guilty to receiving stolen property and selling counterfeit goods.) And in August the FBI announced the arrest of 20 individuals associated with the so-called Mustafa Family, a Minnesota-based group that was involved in shipping stolen phones and parts to black marketers in the Middle East and Asia.

“Even with the Activation Lock, you still have the issue of credit muling, you still have smash-and-grabs,” says Samir Gupte, a product manager at Lookout. He says that eventually, manufacturers could start to tag devices with a unique product key as they are being built; users could be required to have that product key on hand to activate the phone. But manufacturers are unlikely to undertake all the extra work unless compelled to do so, and moreover, as Gupte acknowledges, “thieves often find a way of catching up with any new technology.”

Criminals are ingenious, adaptable. In September, for example, Pennsylvania law enforcement arrested two smartphone thieves for allegedly breaking into several electronics stores. According to police, the men were using a camera-equipped drone to recon their targets.

“There’s no bulletproof solution to smartphone theft and there never will be,” wireless industry analyst Jeff Kagan says. “It’s like the long war between the people who create computer viruses and the people who write security software. Or the people who make radar guns and the people who make radar detectors. It’s just continually escalating.”

In the meantime, there is concern among some activists that kill switch technology will infringe upon the rights of smartphone users. Last year, before the California kill switch bill became law, the Electronic Frontier Foundation penned an open letter criticizing the legislation and highlighting what it called the “potential for abuse.” The government would theoretically have the ability to force carriers to shut down certain phones, the EFF pointed out—a frightening thought to civil libertarians.

Equally frightening is that activating a kill switch does not mean that your privacy won’t be compromised, as was shown a couple of years ago during an attack against the Sony PlayStation Network, in which hackers exposed personal information from 77 million user accounts despite Sony’s ability to shut down its system.

Examining smartphone theft statistics from this angle, along with the proposed fixes and their various drawbacks, one can start to feel a profound despair. Perhaps losing our phones to quick-fingered thieves is just something we’ll have to learn to live with for months and years and decades to come.

When I raise this possibility with security analyst Marc Rogers, formerly of Lookout and now serving the same role with a company called CloudFlare, he demurs. Smartphone theft only looks insoluble, he says, because we’ve come to believe, erroneously, that it’s a monolithic problem that can be solved by a single killer app. In fact, it’s a dense, complicated, multilayered dilemma that requires a multilayered solution.

BEN WISEMAN

Rogers argues that the best way to reduce theft is to embrace an array of complementary techniques. Call it the holistic approach: more kill switches, even if they can be bypassed; more aggressive law enforcement, even if a few thieves manage to slip through the dragnet; and more third-party applications that help shore up defenses.

Lookout makes an app that can track your stolen device, take a snapshot with the front-facing camera and note the location whenever an unauthorized user attempts to access it. And Polo Chau, an assistant professor of computing at Georgia Tech, is researching an authentication protocol that would memorize the highly individualistic ways in which a user swipes and types on a touchscreen. Mated to a security system, such software could power down a phone it concluded was being accessed by an unauthorized user.

“You want to put up obstacles for the criminals at every turn,” Rogers says. “You’ve got to think of the theft of smart devices as an economy, and you’ve got to destabilize that economy. You’ve got to disrupt the supply chains. You won’t get everyone, but in some places you’ll beat them back.”

Maklike black forest

Inhoud
12 sjokolade-muffins (koop klaar gebakte muffins)
2 blikkies ontpitte swartkersies
500 g roomkaas
2 blikke kondensmelk
sap van 1 suurlemoen
125ml brandewyn
500 ml room
Whispers-sjokoladeballetjies vir versiering
versiersuiker om oor te sif
Kruisementblare

Metode

Sny die sjokolade-muffins in die helfte. Dreineer die kersies. Meng die roomkaas en kondensmelk goed en voeg die suurlemoensap by. Pak ’n laag sjokolade-muffins in ’n groot bak of glase. Gooi van die brandewyn oor die muffins.

Gooi ’n laag roomkaasmengsel oor die muffins en pak dan ’n laag kersies. Herhaal dié proses. Klop room styf en skep heel bo-op. Versier met die Whispers (niemand is tog lus om sjokolade-krulle te maak nie), en sif versiersuiker oor. Druk kruisementblaartjies in vir die mooi

Skool is uit

DSCF0031 DSCF0030 DSCF0032 DSCF0033 DSCF0034

Ek en juffrou het Vrydag weggeloop om die einde van die skooljaar te vier

Gastehuis Mt Bijoux

Bloubergstrand

Sir David Blair drive

Daar is so n smal ry erwe tussen sy straat en die see

Die ontbyt was ingesluit by die prys van R1200.00 vir ons twee en was hee skaflik

Naby eetplekke “Ons huisie” = net gesien Petit Four effer duurderige koek ek koffie en tee en baie lekker kish, Was teen half twee uit hamburger broodjies maar het alternatief voorsien die bief was deurspik met klein stukkies kaas maar ek sou verkieslik iets beter as tamatiesous daarby ge-eet het. Koffie besonders lekker en ek het meer in my swart koppie gekry as vroulief in hare met warm melk apart by. Die koffie karamelkoek was Baie Goed

Waneer sluit die skole vir 2015??

Pynappel en Kaas tert

Bestanddele

1 blik “Crushed” Pynappel (dreineer goed)          1 blik kondensmelk

1 klein bottelttjie kaassmeer (ongegeur)              1 ½ koppies fyn gerasperde Cheddar of Gouda

4 eiers (geel en wit geskei)                                  3 eetlepels lemmetjie of suurlemoensap

2 eetlepels suiker

1 pak Marie of Tennis beskuitjies gekrummel en gemeng met kwart koppie gesmelte botter om kors te maak

Metode

Maak kors in in gesmeerde oondvaste tertbak

Meng eiergele, pynappel, (sonder sap) kaassmeer, kaas en kondensmelk met klitser en voeg lemmetjie of suurlemoensap laaste by

Gooi in kors en laat staan 10 minute

Klits eierwitte en suiker tot stywe punte, vorm oor ander bestanddele in bak

Bak in oond teen 180 C todat eiwerwitte goudbruin is (+- 40 minute)

================================================================

Hierdie een is uniek aan my ma

Drink die pynappel sap verkoel as beloning omdat jy die tert gemaak het

Jy kan hom ook in ‘n ringknip pan maak en en hom ‘n pynappel kaaskoek noem

Die bietjie wag is essensieel want die vulsel moet half stol voor jy bak

Kragteloos

What is the difference between the Titanic and South Africa?

When the Titanic went down it’s lights were on

Baba beer sit in sy klein stoeltjie by die tafel, en kyk na sy klein papbordjie. . . . . .
“Wie’t my pappies geëet?” vra hy. . . .
Pappa beer kyk na sy groot papbord. . . .
“Wie de duiwel het my pap geëeet?” vra hy . . . .

Mammabeer se kop verskyn om die kombuisdeur. . . . . . .
” EK HET NOG NIE DIE PAP GEMAAK NIE WANT DIE KRAG IS AF!!!”

NUWE VOLKSLIED Hello darkness my old friend

“In a drive to save on electricity consumption, the light at the end of the tunnel has been switched off until further notice. We apologise for any inconvenience caused. Kindly postpone all hopes and dreams.”

Ontbyt ingesluit

Toe die uwe nog gewerk het vir die Areabestuurder in Kimberley moes ek gereeld Bloemfontein toe vir vergaderings of kursusse (Vrystaat en Noord Kaap was as een streek bestuur.)

Vir die kere wat daar oornag moes word in Bloemfontein en hulle die verblyf gereel het was ek dus in hotel ingeboek.

Die grootste bederf van die hotelle was die ontbyte wat by die tarief ingesluit was.

Kom ons begin

Sterk moerkoffie

Jou eie verpersoonlikte omelet wat gemaak is terwyl jy wag uit 2 reuse eiers en gevul met die jou keuse van bestanddele

‘n Papbord met  K se Rice Crispies bruinsuiker gesnyde piesang en warm melk

Spek, gebakte tamatie, gesnyde niertjies in bruin sous, 2 snye roosterbrood met BOTTER (nie die ander geel goeters nie) vier of vyf soorte kaas en ‘n vars vrug of twee.

Dit behoort my te hou tot hoofkantoor of opleiding my uitneem vir aandete?

WIE IS DIE D$%%^& WAT MY EETLUS INTUSSEN GESTEEL HET??

Grenadella-Kaaskoek

Gong gong waterval

Gong Gong waterval So genoem na die klank van die blouklippe op die klipvoer van die rivier

Grenadella-Kaaskoek

Bestanddele

200 g ricotta
500 g vetvrye gladde maaskaas
3 groot eiers
200 g strooisuiker
15ml suurlemoensap
100ml grenadellamoes

Metode

Voororverhit oond op 160 grade C

Spuit ‘n ronde 20cm tertbak met kleefvrye kossproei. Sit die kaas, eiers, strooisuiker en suurlemoensap in ‘n voetselverwerker en pols tot die mengsel glad is.  Oppas dat jy dit nie te veel meng nie. Gooi die mengsel in die bereide tertbak en bak dit in ‘n voorverhitte oond vir sowat 35 – 40 minute, of tot dit gestol het.  Haal uit die oond en laat heeltemal afkoel

Smeer die grenadellamoes bo-oor die kaaskoek sodra dit afgekoel het. Verkoel in die yskas tot etenstyd.

Uitsmyt

So het die onafwendware tyd vir my ma ook aangebreek en ‘n vierslaapkamer huis se inhoud moes verminder word na wat in ‘n siekeboeg se enkelkamer sal pas. Groot vrieskas vir my kleiner vrieskas vir broer, Ou yskas vir my nuwer yskas vir broer. Ensovoorts, ensovoorts. Die laaste klomp wat op die tweedehandse winkel se bakkie wag is was ook vir haar die ergste.

Stap sy die die ouetehuis binne keer inwonende tannie haar voor met “wat kom maak jy? Trek jyin of kuier jy” Kom die tiepiese Petoors antwoord. “Ek kom wag vir die dood waar is jy op die lys?”

VERKLARENDE WOORDEBOEK

ALMANAK : ‘n Kaart waarop jy kan sien hoe om by Kersfees uit te kom.
AMBULANS : Kombi met diskoligte.
BAAS : Wat Ma vir Pa laat dink hy is.
BABA : ‘n Soort engel waarvan die vlerke korter word namate die bene langer word.
BABAWAENTJIE : Verlede jaar se pret op wiele.
BEGROTING : Iets wat jou laat wakker lê nog voor jy jou geld bestee.
BELASTING : Die beloning vir energie, harde werk en spaarsamigheid.
BOOM : Iets wat jare op een plek bly staan en dan skielik op ‘n dag voor ‘n voertuig inspring.
BROMMER : Vlieg met ‘n dieselengin.
BRUIDEGOM : Iemand wat hom teen iets taais vasgeloop het.
BRUNET : Uitgebrande blondine.
DIEET : ‘n Manier van maer word waarvoor jy gou dik word.
EEND : ‘n Hoender met roeispane vir voete.
EIER : ‘n Voël se geboortedop.
ETENSTYD : Die enigste tyd wanneer ‘n kind nie wil eet nie.
GERAAMTE : Iemand met sy binnekant buite en sy buitekant weg.
GESINSVAKANSIE : Wanneer jy alles saamneem waarvan jy eintlik wil wegkom.
GEWETE : Iets wat pla as alles baie lekker gaan.
HELIKOPTER : Eierklitser met ambisie.
HUWELIKSERTIFIKAAT : ‘n Soort jaglisensie wat jou tot een bok beperk.
INRYTEATER : ‘n Plek waar jy ou prente en jong paartjies aantref.
KARSIEK : Dit wat jy elke maand kry as jy die paaiement moet betaal.
KORTPAD : ‘n Pad waarop jy niemand kan kry om jou te sê waar jy is nie.
KRAAI : Spreeu in ‘n aandpak.
KREDIETKAART : Iets wat meeste mense gebruik wanneer hulle ontdek geld kan nie alles koop nie.
LEKTOR : Iemand wat die rare talent het om ‘n student aan die slaap te praat.
MATRIEKSERTIFIKAAT : Kwitansie wat ‘n kind ontvang vir die rekening wat sy pa betaal het.
MIDDELJARE : Wanneer jy jou emosies vir simptome verruil.
MôRE : ‘n Plek waar jy alles kan aflaai wat jy gister moes gedoen het.
NOODHULP : Jou kans om gesond te word voor die dokter jou beetkry.
OUDERDOM : Wanneer jou ledemate harder kraak as jou stem.
POU : ‘n Hoender wat blom.
PREDIKANT : Ses dae is hy onsigbaar en die sewende dag is hy onverstaanbaar.
ROLSKAATSE : Tekkies sonder remme.
SNIPPERMANDJIE : Iets wat tieners altyd mis kyk.
SNOR : Bolip wat uitrafel.
TAKT : Die vermoë om jou mond toe te maak voor iemand anders dit vir jou doen.
VLEISBRAAI : ‘n Partytjie waar die kos so ‘n bietjie rou en die gaste so ‘n bietjie gaar is.
WEERVOORSPELLER : Iemand met wie die weer nie altyd saamspeel nie.
WITTEBROOD : Die vakansie wat ‘n man neem voordat hy vir ‘n nuwe baas begin werk.

Danie aan http://www.foonpret.co.za/